


She Says She Loves Me

by posingasme



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, F/M, M/M, Mutual Pining, Physical Abuse, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 19:17:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7904476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/posingasme/pseuds/posingasme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Castiel have never liked Ruby, or the way she treats Sam. They both know someone who could do it better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	She Says She Loves Me

**Author's Note:**

> Rare pair challenge to use the song "If Only You Could See" by Tonic for nefarious Sastiel purposes. 
> 
> Also for Anon prompting Sam in unhealthy relationship.

If Castiel hadn't known better, he might have thought Sam and Dean had been brawling, considering the mark under Sam's eye. Not that they didn't wrestle periodically. But they usually drew the line at actually damaging one another. 

On the other hand, that was definitely Dean's serious face. 

Castiel cleared his throat. “What's going on, guys?” he murmured. 

Sam shot him a sulking glare. “Stay out of this.”

But Dean shook his head. “No. No, let's bring him in. I'd like to know his opinion. If he thinks I'm out of line, maybe I am.”

“Cas always sides with you!” Sam accused. “It never matters if you're right!”

Castiel disagreed with that analysis on all accounts. But he looked at Dean for his decision. 

The older brother was waving him deeper into the house he had just entered, which the three of them shared, though Sam was often at his girlfriend’s place instead. But Castiel didn't like to think of that. And in spite of what Sam might say if he knew, it wasn't just because Castiel had been in love with Sam for three years that he disliked Ruby. Ruby was a bitch. He disliked bitches in general. Being in love with Sam simply made it worse. 

“Cas, I walked in a few minutes ago to see that demon bitch-”

“Ruby,” Castiel clarified. 

“Of course Ruby!”

Castiel nodded. 

Sam threw his hands in the air and turned to stare out the window angrily. 

“She was hitting him. Hitting him! Like, not in the fun way!”

Castiel wasn't sure there was any fun way to be struck by a girl like Ruby, but that was probably because he was gay and she was a bitch. 

“So what?” Sam shouted back. “It's not the first time! It doesn't matter! You think I can't handle it? She's a girl, literally half my size!”

Dean's eyes sparked with rage. “Oh, that makes everything all right? Does it? If it were a guy, would it be different?”

“Of course it would! But that isn't the point!”

“Damn right it isn't the point!” Dean barked. “How long has she been wailing on you like that?”

Sam’s glare dropped to the ground. “Look, it isn't as big a deal as you're making it out to be. I said something stupid, and she let me have it. It isn't like I'm this cowering victim. Stop making it sound like I'm being abused.”

Dean looked at Castiel, indicating it was his turn until his fury had dissipated enough for him to speak coherently again. 

Castiel licked at his pink lips thoughtfully. “Sam, I'm curious about the question you didn't answer. Is this a usual method for Ruby to let you know she's displeased with something you've said or done?”

“Jesus, Cas! You make it sound like-”

He put his hand up. “I apologize. I'm simply trying to understand. I've been involved with martial arts my whole life, and I've never once felt the need to strike a friend or lover in order to express disapproval of something they've said. So I'm not able to relate to Ruby. Help me understand.”

Quite unexpectedly, Sam burst into tears. He shook his head, but it was almost as though he was trying to maintain his anger, to hold onto it. “Guys, really. It's just something she and I have to work out. It's no one else's business. And it's embarrassing, okay? I mean, I'm six four and entirely capable of taking care of myself. Obviously I'm not going to want to tell you my tiny girlfriend has anger issues. What does that say about me? And anyway…” He gasped in a breath before he could go on. “She says she loves me,” he whimpered. 

Castiel felt his heart ripping apart mercilessly. If he were the one allowed to love Sam, he wouldn't ever leave a doubt in his mind. He would never touch him with anything but complete respect and tenderness. It was entirely unfair that Sam instead gave his affection and body, time and attention to a woman who preyed on his good heart. He remained silent, and looked to Dean to let him know it would need to come from him. 

The older man sighed. “That ain't love, Sammy. It just...it just isn't.”

“If you could only see the way she loves me...maybe you would understand,” Sam said desperately. “It isn't always bad! When she says she loves me…”

“What does she say when she slaps you in the face?” Dean asked. His voice was quiet, but the words were without mercy. 

Sam stumbled to the couch and sat hard. He let his head fall into his hands, covering the red welt which must have come from Ruby’s ring. “She calls me pathetic,” he forced out. 

Castiel could see Dean's eyes slip closed, and he knew he was fighting against his own temper again. So he sat beside Sam gingerly, awkwardly, and put his hand on his arm. 

To his surprise, Sam leaned into him, and suddenly, Castiel was holding him, supporting him. “She says I'm worthless,” he sobbed. “She says...she says I'm a freak.”

Castiel shot Dean a warning look as his friend began to actually snarl. He kept his own voice soft and somewhat neutral. “Sam, do you think I would ever say such a thing to a man I loved?”

“Not all of us can find a Castiel!” Sam snapped bitterly. “I know! I've looked!” He pushed himself out of his friend’s arms and stood on shaking legs. “Stop telling me what I already know! You'd never treat someone like that. Because you'd never date someone like me! A pathetic, worthless freak like me is lucky to have someone like Ruby! At least she pretends to love me! You've ignored me for years! So you don't get to tell me why you're better to the men you see than Ruby is to me! You think I don't know? Just-just leave me alone!”

When the bedroom door slammed, Castiel turned very slowly to Dean. 

His best friend shrugged. “Don't look at me like that. I didn't know he was into guys too. Go on! If it'll get Ruby’s claws out of him, I'm all for it!”

Castiel took a breath, and knocked on the door. “Sam?”

“Just go away, Cas! I can't-Look, I'm sorry, okay? You meant well. But I can't-I can't look at you right now. Just forget I ever said anything.”

He leaned against the door to sigh. “Sam,” he called again. “Please let me in. I'd like to talk.”

A sour laugh floated out. “And I'd really rather not. My big brother just walked in on me getting wailed on by the only girl who even pretends to care about me, and I just came out to him as bisexual by admitting I've wanted his best friend for years. His best friend, who has guys lining up to audition for a role I would be horrible at. So I'm about all full up on humiliation just now. Come back later.”

Castiel reached deep for courage, and plunged forward. “Sam, I've been in love with you since the moment we met. And I've been dying inside thinking Ruby isn't good to you. Please. Let me be good to you. Leave her, and I promise I'll show you how a beautiful man like you should be treated.”

There was a deafening silence for far too long. Castiel could feel Dean staring, but could hear only his pulse in his own ears. 

“Sam?”

The door opened slowly. Tears were streaming down Sam's handsome face. “Are you lying to me?” he rasped hoarsely. “Is this some kind of cruel joke? Because I will never forgive you for this.”

Castiel stared up at him. “Sam, ask Dean. I've been hopeless for you all this time.”

Dean snorted softly behind him. “He's a complete mess,” he confirmed. 

Sam watched them each for a long moment. At last, a shaky smile brightened his face. “You love me?”

“I said I love you. I know you've heard that before, but you haven't heard it the way it's meant to be said. I love you, Sam. Let me love you.”

As he watched, the red humiliation and painful doubt seemed to melt from Sam's face. “Cas,” he hissed out. 

He reached up to tenderly touch the bruised skin across that lovely cheekbone. “Please, Sam. You deserve better than this. Even if you won't have me, please leave her. If she's got issues to work out, let her do it, but not at your expense. No one deserves to be treated that way, and certainly not you.”

But Sam was shaking his head. “If I won't have you? Cas, there has never been a moment since you came into our lives that I wouldn't have had you.”

Dean took a breath behind them. “So, one of us should take the dogs out before they destroy the place.” He whistled shrilly, and opened the door to the backyard when two retrievers flew from Sam's bedroom, pushing Sam further toward Castiel on their way by. Dean and the dogs disappeared into the yard, and the door closed behind them.

Castiel's eyes remained fixed on Sam. “You're none of those things she says. You're important, Sam.”

“I don't...I don't want to be alone. I know how that sounds. But if there's anything about this you don't mean, please, Cas. Be honest with me. I can make things work with Ruby. She's getting better, and-”

“Sam, don't leave her for me. Leave her for you.”

He looked away. “Cas, I can't…”

Castiel sighed. He touched the bruised face again, and for the first time in these lonely years, he let his adoration of Sam shine through his eyes. “Then do this one thing for me, and I'll help you learn to take care of you the way you deserve. Call her now. Please.”

“Isn't that a dick move? Breaking up over the phone?”

The older man shook his head at him. “Sam, you don't need to put yourself in a situation where she can manipulate or hurt you again. If you need to get anything from her apartment, I'll go with you. You're still thinking of how to do right by her when she clearly isn't concerned with doing right by you.”

“I'm the guy,” Sam said weakly. 

Castiel rolled his eyes. “And we'll work on your issues with gender roles and your latent bisexuality later too. For now, please dump your girlfriend so I can kiss you.”

Sam laughed in a quiet voice. “With an offer like that, how can I refuse?”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!!
> 
> ~Posing


End file.
